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‘Spying her brown shell, Red M&M assumes Brown M&M is naked, unzips his onesie and starts dancing around to LMFAO’


The archetype of the red and yellow M&Ms is well known. Red is smart and wily, yellow is dumb but lovable. They’re essentially Harry and Marv from Home Alone in crisp, chocolatey form. Personally, I’ve always found the red M&M to be smug, turning up on the cinema screen and signalling that those exciting trailers for new films I was watching are over and the underwhelming one I paid £12.50 to see is about to begin. It’s no surprise to learn then, that away from his bozo buddy Yellow, Red is a bit sleazy. Just look at how he’s acting around this new Brown M&M, wandering around like a knock-off DiCaprio who has just finished reading The Game and needs to neg someone asap.


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